Q Dear Gay Uncle,
I’ve been stupid. To keep up with a group of guys, I’ve got myself into debt. I’ve surrounded myself with designer clothes, extravagant luxuries, along with a car and home that I can barely afford to run let alone keep up with payments.
The last year has been a glossy range of extravagant parties, meals out, and exotic holidays. My Instagram feed looks amazing as I’ve constantly added glossy filtered to an inch of their life photos. But my finances are shot.
Last week my car got taken back, my landlord said she wouldn’t be renewing my lease due to the haphazard rent payments, and my credit card was declined and stopped. Everything has come to an abrupt halt.
I sat down yesterday and worked out what I’d spent, and I was horrified. I’ve spent more in a year than I did in the four years I spent at college. I do have a decent career and work promotions are on the horizon, which will mean more money. But, unless I move in with my mother and don’t go out at all for years, it’s going to takes around five years to pay it off.
I spoke to a friend and confessed what a predicament I was in, and he laughed it off. He then told the group I was hanging out with, and now they’re not returning calls or responding to me on social media.
I feel like I’m in a bad high school teen movie, but I’m nearly 30 and nearly bankrupt. What should I do?
You’ve begun addressing the financial issue. It may take years, but you can do it. Life is about balancing life, needs, wants and desires. Sometimes life does have a blow out to extremes, and we have all made decisions that we’re not proud of.
As to your immediate situation, work out what’s needed, with the nuts and bolts of who’s owed what and where, and work through a payment plan. If you can return any of the items you’ve bought from the stores, then do so. With regards to your finances, many creditors would prefer a restructured payment plan rather than someone declaring themselves bankrupt and not getting anything back. Open up communications links with these creditors.
With regards to your friendship circle, maybe use this as an opportunity to re-evaluate if these people you hung around with were actual true friends or just casual acquaintances who were in it for what they could get.
Clarity is a good thing and sometimes the best outcomes can be built from a crisis situation.
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